Holy Christ

To make up for the lack of funny in my last entry, I just wanted to tell you all that someone in the UK found my blog by Googling "the alien strapped the girl into gynecological stirrups."

This is probably the proudest moment of my life.

I Guess Everyone is a Turd

It's definitely time for another installment of "Things People Have Googled to Get to My Blog."

I'm a bit surprised-- this time there are considerably less references to being ugly and more references to flatulence. Hah.

Without further ado, here we go:
* fart (Figures.)
* sack up ho
* whaaaat
* whaaaat? (Apparently that question mark didn't make much of a difference.)
* sienna miller pissburgh
* oksana baiul mug shot
* pmom december 2006 centerfold
* mount lebanon top 25 list
* stirrups exam blog feet (Gynecological blogs are good reading.)
* roethlisberger fucks black girls (Seriously. I can't make this shit up.)
* stirrups exam blog
* nancy kerrigan nostril (A subject that intrigues all of us.)
* funny things to do to annoy people (If you have to Google it, you don't deserve it.)
* oksana baiul playboy (Ew. Really?)
* i suck at everything (Finally, something self-deprecating!)
* pmom december 2006
* 2006 playmate pictorial posters

Interesting.
Sorry this was such a cop-out of a blog, I'm taking it easy in anticipation of Monday's entry, a pictorial entitled "What I Do at Work." I've been working on it all week.

Responsibility is for Those Who are Responsible

So today, as I do almost daily, I clicked the link in my statcounter.com profile to see what people had Googled to land on my blog. They are usually really sad, self-deprecating things like, “why doesn’t anyone like me” and “how do I get a boyfriend even though I’m ugly,” which I believe speaks volumes about, well, me.

Sometimes the entries are really random: in the last three days I’ve gotten at least five hits from someone Googling: “Telia paternity test Maury Shardae,” which is from when I was unemployed and spent my days blogging about daytime television. Now that I think about it, I’m a pretty pathetic person, and my blog just reinforces that. But anyway…

Today I got a hit from someone that had Googled: “hooker myspace profile south carolina” which is very, very funny. Then I scrolled down a little ways, and found this entry: “I have HIV.”

My heart kind of hit the floor when I read that. I really hope that it was someone doing research for a high school health class paper or something, and not someone looking for a support group and instead finding me, some perfectly healthy little brat, whining about how everyone that works at Magee is at least mildly retarded. (Because, well, they are, but that’s beside the point. That reader had bigger issues. See what I'm saying?)

Which leads me to this point—by writing for the public, however small a “public” it may be, do we mere bloggers need to take on some degree of social responsibility? I mean, I don’t know. These words are out there for anyone to read. I guess I sort of wonder if/how it affects people.

Ugh. I can’t be socially responsible.
The entry I’d planned to write today was about how, this morning, I stood up from my desk and accidentally farted.



PS, there are a plethora of fart-related cartoons on the internets. I urge you to read all of them.